The eternal Eve vs. Adam debate
Ok...so I'm suffering from what can be called an "over-active" mental-activity syndrome. There's so much anticipation about this semester...I mean its just the end of week 2 and all I want is to get to the "happening" portion fast enough and get it over and done with. Plus..I realise that all that sweat over MRM in year two may well just be worth it considering that for nearly all my modules I have to use SPSS.....no full forms for the software.....it can't get geekier than that.

Anyways..lets not dig the dirt in my not-so-happening life and instead focus on the 'better' topic of this entry...which marks the return of 'face-your-destiny' from near death.

Recently a friend had a terrible breakup...I mean she was seeing the guy for nearly 4 years and then suddenly he decided to call it quits. Tragic...how a day can lead to sudden change of heart. Now she ofcourse is distraught...and I being the still-single, level-headed, responsible girl-friend am the shoulder to sob on...as for the guy...well...since I knew them both..I even have to hear out his story. So all this story-hearing brings me back to the oft-discussed, very interesting and quite cliche Eve vs Adam debate.

Eve is always complaining about Adam lacking EQ..or lets just put it this way...his inability to show that he may infact have some EQ. He isn't all ears to her talk...and I think as girls..most of us think 'talking' is OUR prerogative and listening is his...well..there can always be exceptions. Also..he always seems to lack that certain subtlety...I mean...we can't tell when the guy is actually being romantic and when he is just being nice..My ears are in the danger of falling off if I hear another "Oh..he always smiles at me, waves to me and generally asks around...but why the hell hasn't he ever-approached me..I mean..I think he likes me if he's doing all of that...." Its not that...just because somebody is being nice to you doesn't mean he likes you..or rather likes you in the romantic way...It doesn't work like that. I mean...even us girls are NICE to guys...we chit-chat, joke around and all that...but that definitely doesn't mean that we have a thing for the particular guy?! Still, it seems the rules change when it comes to the boys...and that always leads to all the emotional trouble...You know..in love as in life..Buddha offers Nirvana..."Desire is the route to all troubles..desire not have not" period...It'll come if it has to..just don't think so much about it!

Ok..I've spoken so much about us girls...but that doesn't mean that I'm sparing ADAM...the eternal wreck...with the EQ=spoon brain...Or is it just the relationship-factor that makes you become like that...This 4-year-old relationship guy said that he couldn't be with the girl 'cause he was getting "tired" of her..I mean..what the hell?! First you date her...then you propose to her..followed by so many years of dating...and then you just break up...I think people who are SO confused about what they want should really just stay out of the game till they figure out how it works...or feel more prepared for it. Break-ups are Bad...and I think its worse for us girls coz we afterall have the HIGHER emotional quotient. Also..I have one last word for guys who send out the wrong signals...I think you're the son of a >>>>> if you make a girl feel that she's the one..when you're actually just playing games and have no intention on getting serious. period.

Bottomline: My girl-friends think that I should become a woman's rights activist, my guy friends think that I'm being sexist and frankly...I think a. I've been too much of an agony aunt and should move on b. Never date and never feel sorry for not having THE guy in my life :P

Pesky relatives and week 1
So school's finally started and even though I cannot come to comment on the immense work load and pressure facing me in the coming 16 weeks, I'm happy nevertheless. The classes all turned out surprisingly good and I'm feeling gung-ho about giving my best to all the projects facing me this semester, stick-ups notwithstanding. Lets just hope for the best. For now everything's on a stable coach.
But the problem is a pesky set of 'distant' relatives who have suddenly decided to 'drop by'. The bane of a collectivist culture where relatives are 'always welcome', these annoying people are honestly like plague..as far as I'm concerned and the fact they'll be putting up in my premises makes my blood boil. Gosh...how I'd like to be the lil' 'innocent' kid who gives them a tough time...but NO! much as I detest the situation I still have to be nice..ewww...I hate to be fake. This is just one of the few situations where I have to be. Why can't life be smooth??

Pieces of poetry..

In the valley of darkness lies a little something...untold it may be but never inconspicious
You see it..but you may choose to ignore it
You may not love it (maybe you do...beneath the superficial clutter)
But you can never hate it..(dislike is rather minor)
You may try to...but you'll never poison it
For its pristine..
and purer than anything you've ever laid your eyes on..
Look a little deeper...
Care a bit more..
Read awhile...
You'll never move on..
Lying in the valley of darkness is a little glass room..
Illuminated by true beauty..
that shines even without any sunlight
Just don't throw any stones...
the heart is fragile and it'll break...
but even when it goes..
It'll shine..
crystal shattering in a world of glass..

Adapting
Last year, by chance...I landed up taking the "Green Vision" module...But I never regretted it. It gave me an insight into nature's breath-taking ability to adapt by establishing ecosystems...survival games...and ofcourse it provided a breather from the usual mass comm rigarmole.

Recently I was made to remember some of the things I learnt for Green Vision, specifically - Climate change and its consequences. Yes, its been a bit of a regular in the news, but I'm thinking as usual..of how this is so relevent to each one of us...

You see, nature's changing...a little something called Global warming (for the uninitiated)..temperatures everywhere are rising..albiet just a tad...and this rise has contributed to major changes in plant and animal life throughout the globe. Some lie on the brink of extinction, others undergo modifications. Bottomline - they're all adapting.

Yes..adapting...and thats the one valuable personal lesson I take from the wider circumstances. Life is not always pleasent. Situations aren't always easy-pleasy. People are usually not very nice and despite this we need to do what the plant and animal kingdom is doing in the wake of this not-so-pleasent climate change - adapt.

It never was and never will be a cake walk. Bruises to your humility, ego and person are inevitable....sometimes I feel that some situations are a part of some predestined game-plan to deliberately bruise our sentiments, make us suffer and toughen that skin...breaking any rose-tinted glasses. Its cringe-worthy, tearful and miserable...but live through it. I've done so...perhaps (hopefully not) will undergo it in time to come...(such things I find rarely escape...they repeat themselves..whether we like them or not).

Optimism however has proved to me...in the past two decades of this life that there is always light at the end of the tunnel...and that end isn't always as far as we may deem it to be...

So I guess with a touch of optimism, in between all that nervousness, thinking-for-the-future and coping-with-the-present..I'll hit the FINAL study semester here at Ngee Ann...and live through any tough stuff I may have to face...God willing (otherwise!)

Small rumblings
"Change is the only constant" ..how much ever I hear that, witness that and experience that...I still seem to grumble and have problems with change...and it ceases to leave me...

Take for instance..."back-to-school" routines....since time immemorial I have hated that feeling...of going back to school after leisurely holidays. It always signals change...so you get back...and even though its the same people...things are changed...new time-tables, new classmates, new teachers..people looking different...what with wieght loss, new haircuts yadda yadda....and this is the way it has been..ever since I walked into school...regimentation suffocates me...I can no longer do as I please..sleep & eat whatever and whenever I want..read the latest novel that caught my attention from begining to end just as I please, sit down for some music practise, newspaper reading, painting...whatever....school it seems..takes over my life...and I start craving for that freedom...

I remember wanting to be like Hugh Grant in "About a boy"...ok...my ma thinks that thats like having the ambition to become a wastrel...You know...sometimes for all that self-righteousness, uptightness, seeming seriousness and ambition..I just want to be foot loose and fancy free. Ya well...dream on...I know that this is just a temporary phase..or lets just say the repurcussion of sensing impending change..

Nevertheless...life goes on...and the waves of change keep hitting home...but the beach is long, the scenes surreal in their totality and well the walk...thats inevitable...so walk on and I guess sometime or the other the horizon will reach us and the shores won't be so changeable any more...small rumblings not withstanding ;)