GYM RATS
So, like the hundreds of others who made a resolution to cut the flab this year, I too found a reasonably priced gym and became a member (it's recession time after all).

I find gyms to be wonderful playfields when it comes to people-watching..yes, I know the intellectuals among my readers find this a very lowly hobby, but excuse me...I LOVE to people watch and just to clarify..bitching about others IS DIFFERENT from merely observing them. Besides, as social animals it's our 'janm-sidh adhikar' (birth-right) to indulge in such frivolity!

Now, gyms can feel like a downer if you're on the wrong side of the scales (like yours truly) and feel tired after an intense hour of cardio and pumping iron. But if you're fit and fab...it's the best damn place to show off..So I find some fab bodies wearing lycra gear to show off their amazing gams and abs...Nice...I'm happy for you..But trust me, it looks outright cheap when one can decipher exactly what underwear you're wearing through the thin cover of the lycra. Also, please, if you're well-endowed, it's best to avoid such displays....I won't venture further. For the intelligent, just a hint is enough...

Then there are the narcissistic and arrogant trainers (some of them) who can't stop hinting (or screaming aloud actually) just what a mess you've made of yourself and how much mind-boggling effort it will take to get back into decent shape. OK! I get it..I need 2 sets of 30 push-ups to work those blessed love-handles...but is it a must to scream it out and let the whole place know what a supposed loser I am just because I'm out-of-shape and getting tired of the damn work-out?! (My instructor, bless her, was kinder, she only gave me 20...)

Oh, and how can I forget the aunti-jis and uncle-jis..I've utmost respect for our senior citizens but sometimes I find, with some of them, they fail to realise their age. Tight gym gear in loud colours looks awful and more so if you're 50 and above, with all the obvious signs of ageing. Sagging, wrinkly skin, walking with a hunch, a healthy gift of excess flab etc are a few hard-to-miss signs. But I was shocked to see one of the aunties flirting shamelessly with a guy instructor half her age...ewwwwww....

The last of the specimens I have observed are well-toned people in tight gear (will somebody just wear a pair of gym pyjamas already?!) who think it's alright to keep checking out others, talking and laughing loudly with friends and generally making themselves stand-out...I think someone should tell them that this is just harming their reputation...that's all..

Just a signing off note...all this in meant in jest, please don't take offence..Maintaining a healthy body is an excellent thing to do...so goodluck if you've joined some regimen :)